Filed under: challenge
omg. my life is so sad. i can’t live a day without the f-word and s-word. 
they run across my mind at least 50 times a day.
i promise, its really unintentional.
Filed under: challenge
OK, this might come across as random.
but NOW is the time to GET RID of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander and DIRTY LANGUAGE. Colosians 3:8
I do realize how dirty my mouth is, I say the word ‘shit’ probably as many times as i use the word ‘she”. God knows how many times I’ve said ‘fuck’ in my mind, and sometimes in extreme circumstances, out loud as well. I knew it was not right, and I thought of eliminating all these but I never thought of erasing them completely. I thought its alright do it slowly, after all people around me would still love me as who I’m right?
Regardless of how people will still love me as who I’m, with effect of about 12 minutes ago, I declare my life away from these dirty languages FOREVER.
Honestly, 12 minutes ago I was still not ready to give them up. After all, what else can substitute multi-purpose descriptive words such as ‘shit’ and ‘fuck’? For now, my answer is still: absolutely NOTHING. If it is not NOW, it will be NEVER.
Besides, with all that I’m blessed with and all that He had given me, the least I could do is to offer my life completely to Him. Eliminating a couple of vocabularies from my vernacular is considered nothing comparing to being nailed on the cross. I still have Him to depend for my exam tomorrow, and I have Him not only tomorrow, but for all the days of my life.
It is time, and it is NOW. I hope everyone of you could help me too. This will be the last post which contains foul words. The last of my life, last of this blog, the other blog and never again from my mouth.
I guess obeying the simplest instruction is not always the easiest thing to do. First was to be a peacemaker. It took me some time to obeyed and when I finally did, I received no reply. This is my second mission, I hope its not going to take me a life time to get used to it. I wonder what is next.
Filed under: challenge
I made an attempt to reconcile and become a peacemaker. I’ve learnt that trusting and obeying takes a whole lot of effort.
Therefore I can go back to the alter and offer my life in peace.
Can You trust me with more now?
There are just times when you think you’re going to be chosen as something despite your limitations because the others around you are just too overly encouraging.
And these are the times when you doubt ‘prophecy’ kind of sentences you get from other people.
You know why? Cos you’re not chosen for what you prayed for. Instead, those that were far from their talents were given posts that you thought they didn’t deserve. They were perfectly fine beings with outstanding imperfections. Then you compare yourself to them, who aren’t that far from where you were standing. You questioned why and settled with ‘not being good enough’.
I thought I was the only one who felt this way. I’m surprised to realize that there were many who probably went through the war I had in my mind or the war with God.
I guess I’m not ashamed of all these anymore, and I’m way long over that phase.
What could I say?
What could I do?
But to offer this life, completely to you.
Filed under: challenge
i had some lite n easy bread sitting in the fridge since may. it was only 2 minutes ago when i realized that the outer surface of these bread has been attacked by psychrophiles. most surface area of it was covered with filaments of whatever species of green microorganism multiplying on it. yueack!
i don’t know how to describe the status of my well-being right now. i’m worried for my exams but the whole pre-exam thing happened again. i hate being in this situation, and i know that i have the authority to stop it. but something is just wrong with me, i cant seems to be doing the things that i really need to be doing. i have my priorities listed and i believe they are all in the going towards the right direction. just that i’ve come to an age where listing priorities is no longer the challenge, acting out priorities by its definition is what i really need to do.
i’m extremely convinced that redundant and irrelevant stuffs can really eat up your life. even if you’re aware of it, you unconsciously allow it to happen over and over again. or maybe, its just me.
i need to set aside time for EVERYTHING.
LORD, i need you. i will hold on to the promise you revealed through paul, from his wisdom, i shall learn and follow. i will also consider my present sufferings unworthy, comparing to the glory that will be revealed in me. all these are not even sufferings, they are a matter of discipline.
